Wednesday, 21 May 2014
Asking Yourself solution focused questions
Our ability to produce intelligent solutions to complex problems is a direct result of our ability to ask useful questions about that problem. So it is not thinking per se that we need to be good at, necessarily, although this helps too, but asking smart questions.
Are you paying attention to the kind of questions you are asking about the problem?
You can run any subject through these questions, career, relationship, weight loss or conflict.
The idea is to answer both sets of questions and compare the notes afterwards to see for yourself what effect it can have. It’s really interesting what comes up!
The first set of questions, are the types that we often unconsciously ask ourselves. We do it by habit, in our everyday moans. These questions are unhelpful; they do not allow us to focus on solving the problem – they actually focus on the problem thus escalating it.
The second set constructively direct our focus towards the solutions. The information that these set of questions dig up contain the solution to the actual problem.
1. Questions that keep us stuck:
“How does it make me feel?”
"Why do I have this problem?"
"How long have I had it?"
"Whose fault is it?"
2. Solution Focused Question
"What do I want, specifically, (instead of the problem)?"
“What will I see when I have what I want?”
“How will it feel, exactly, to have what I want?”
"How will I know, specifically, that I have it?"
"In what ways will my life improve?"
"What small thing could I do today to bring me closer to improving the situation?"